Finally deciding that his 50 billion dollar stockpile would be sufficient to serve him appropriately enough in his golden years despite social security, Bill Gates, the King of Nerds, recently announced that he would be retiring from Microsoft in July of 2008.

In the letter to his employes,Gates wrote: For these last 31 years, I've had the best job in the world. I've worked with some of the brightest and most passionate people in the world. Together, we've built a great company whose products have empowered people around the world.

Gates, who co-founded the software giant as a quintessential high school nerd who got bone-jarring “noogies” every day at lunch by bullies, now will be retiring as much, much richer version of that nerd without those awful noogies. The company enjoyed unprecedented success in the business world under Gates. Now a "Gentleman of Leisure", Gates will now have time to invest in an updated more trendy wardrobe (we hope), do some gardening at his 67,000 square foot home, get lasik treatment, or possibly join the yacht war with mortal enemy, Oracle founder Larry Ellison. Ellison currently has the longest yacht in the world at over one and a half football fields.

I’ll bet Bill could one up him with 50 billion “Benjamins.” How about a $200 Million Dollar yacht Mr. Gates? Long time company man, Ray Ozzie will take over for Gates and assume the role of Chief nerd.

Bow down and praise the King of Nerds. Gates retirement begs the question- what to get him for his retirement ? Kareem Abdul Jabbar got rocking chairs as a farewell send-off from the NBA. What would you possibly get Bill Gates, a man that has everything?

A PimpWiz Exclusive By, Dave Gleason